Bittersweet.

I have been filled to overflowing lately with the heart breaking sweetness and sorrow of life. My good friend Sue has for years been telling me to “feel my feelings”. For the longest time I have engaged with this as a cerebral exercise and a bit of a “fake it til you make it” attitude. In our culture (western american society) it seems that emoting and feeling are signs of weakness. I myself have quipped the phrases “I’ll put on my big girls pants” or “put on a brave face” as if sporting even the slightest sign of vulnerability would label me as weak. I have come to realize that “sunny side up” is not a sustainable paradigm if one is to be real and moreover experience the fullness of life. We can take a cue from nature. There is a sunrise and a sunset. There is indeed a dark side of the moon. Trees bloom and leaf out and then drop their leaves and retreat into stillness during winter. For everything there is an ebb and a flow. The tide rises and recedes. We inhale and exhale. So why, oh why do we expect to be perennially happy? I get that happy is so much more enjoyable than sad. Sadness however, is an inevitable component of a full existence. Allow for the true unabashed joy of a moment without reserve and also welcome the heart tenderising sadness of a passing or loss. Both are to be honored and not to be held past their useful life. Love, live, laugh and be sad in equal measure. Be compassionate with yourself and others in all these moments. Be happy for the happy, be sad with the sad. Crack a smile and shed a tear. Be real and true. Be you.